Course Outline








Lesson 1:

English has suffered in Nigerian hands a lot ever since it was introduced by them colonial masters. It witnessed the “r” and “l” substitution by the Igbo’s

it made it through the “p” situation in the hands of the Hausas it even survived us creating a whole different syntactical and verb agreement wrong form of grammar we call broken English

but one thing that i believe saved it and kept it going through all this, is the fact that written English remained written English

But alas in our age we have decided to fix this oversight.


we have short forms for everything now, acronyms like tgif and tdb are common. Some are actually meaningful others are plain just retarded .

we daily look for shorter ways to write everything, the kids have almost forgotten how to spell and the bb craze going on in our country is not really helping matters.

(Why the phone is trending over here i have no idea, cos let’s face it, it is crap) and the worst part of this all is that i am even affected

do u know how many times i had to backspace because i typed “becos” instead of “because” or “n” instead of “and”?.


There are 2 main types of these short hand forms that really piss me off, i call them


1. Useless ones

2. Conversation killers


The useless ones


Initially short forms where used to abbreviate sentences that where very common. short forms where mainly acronym based

i.e the first letter of each word was used to make up the short for example

age sex location (asl). Thank God its Friday(TGIF) these actually make sense, but nowadays u see stuff like llnp and ggmub what does this even me

long live no prosperity ? How can u use the short form of a word in an acronym? it’s just wrong and there are even shorts that are longer than

their originals. Once saw a girl write “mii” instead of “me”. I’m not even going to talk about that



Conversation killers


Nigerian girls finally “do not carry last ” and have found very useful ways or techniques to use various kind of these short forms to Kill all conversations (by our I mean we guys).three of their favorite weapons are


1. Lol

2. K

3. Brb


Lol meaning (laughing out loud)


Real meaning: you are beginning to disturb me


Main usage: to annoy and frustrate


They really outdid themselves with this one, never new laughter cud be so annoying picture this scenario


Problem: boy collects girls pin, boy chats with girl for one week, girl gets tired of boy. Boy keeps disturbing girl, girl needs to get rid of boy


Well not to fear the “lol” to the rescue.


Solution: (sample chat)


Boy: sup


Girl: fine


Boy: so how have u been?


Girl: lol


Boy: this one you are happy like this today


Girl: lol


Boy: aii, so u wants to go out today


Girl: lol



Boy: y are u lolling (yes lol apparently has the ing form *eye roll*)


Girl: lol


As u can see I assure u that boy will get the message



K meaning ok (which is the short form of okay, so this is like a grand short form or something. smh)


K real meaning I have more important things to do than chat


Usage: same as above



Brb meaning be right back


Real meaning f*** off




Of all their tools this is the dreaded, usually used in these kinds of scenarios


Scenario: boy gets girls pin



Girl: where did u get my pin?


boy: I got it from a friends fone


Boy: u looked nice and I really want to get to know u


Girl: k


Girl: brb (f**k off)


Then for full measure they usually change their DP or pms just to let u know they didn’t go any where


I’ve gotten some brbs in my time, some occasions if u ask me it was totally uncalled for…smh


Anyways it’s been nice venting on this blog, thanks cuz for this opportunity.

So I guess ill ttyl and that said ill






22 thoughts on “General Studies 101: CONVERSATION KILLERS

  1. Lol! This is dope (I said lol). But I love this, beautiful piece dusty. The one that annoys me the most is GGUMB, I don’t understand why one should shorten God’s name. Thanks Cuz for this one


  2. love it…. finally someone said it… the short forms that are longer or equal to the actual words actually piss me off too, and then the dumb ones like “shun in place of tion” .. i’ve seen “c2ayshun” like seriously???


  3. Lool!! (I dropd mine), btw, wat doz d xtra ‘o’ stand 4? D, Ʊ forgot my personal favourities…c(see), b(be), 2(to), 4(for), d(the), btw(by the way) n a host of many odas tu numerous2menshyon…hehe


  4. Well you left out the Yoruba tribe and their addition of “H” to words like Airforce- Hairforce , Ibadan Sampion for Champion etc In your introduction of the topic.

    It has infact translated to the usage ” Aw far” or “Aw much” instead of How since they can’t pronounce H but will rather add it when its unnecessary


  5. I cant believe i have just discovered this blog…..

    It’s “kk” that drives me absolutely nuts. As in the user is supposedly abbreviating “ok”??????? Like seriously???????/


  6. Hearing GGMUB for D̶̲̥̅̊ first time, I was confused, I practically filled it up i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ my own words but I didn’t just make sense… @ dusty can U̶̲̥̅̊ imagine IJN meaning i̶̲̥̅̊n̶̲̥̅̊ Jesus name…dat aint fresh @ al….


  7. LOL.. This is such a fun post. Had to read the comments to get the GGMUB. WOW! People actually say that!
    I think out of everything the one I dislike most is using more letters to type a word that is naturally short.
    Might as well JUST SPELL IT RIGHT!?! You Know?


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